Donatello´s nest

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Eye Contact I

Written by a woman.

It is always useful to have ideas of working out who is dominant and submissive. I think I can sometimes tell but I suspect nothing is very foolproof unless you’re getting to the point of touching of reasonably intimate conversation.
In the UK it is rare for anyone to call anyone “sir”, except in hotels and restaurants, so that does not cross over the Atlantic very well as a plan. I do hold people’s eyes in conversation which I think is just a sign that you’re socially adept but I also blush and I usually respond to dominance in general and I suspect it’s fairly easy to tell I’m submissive. I suspect the blushing is because I’m English and have freckles/that type of skin as much as because I’m submissive however.

With dominant boyfriends I always want to look down and in fact I’m more often told to look at them but then we’re moving on to a different topic than this thread. Eyes down is a fairly traditional submissive gesture, requirement not to look filmstars in the eyes when you clean their house written into the contract, Eastern women looking at the ground, Muslim women not allowed to look at men etc.

What works for me if a man is trying to work out if I’m submissive is being more direct than men often are – so a subtle form of order and then if she obeys that is a good sign or I notice some dominant men just joke quite a lot in conversation with everyone with occasional mentions of spankings or whatever. Depends on the dinner party conversation you’re used to though… not sure how risque discussions over dinner are in the US mid West compared to London.

It is all a bit hit and miss. I find it much more efficient to date men who describe themselves as dominant so you get all that out of the way before you meet

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November 2, 2008 - Posted by | Eye Contact | , , , , , , ,

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